Online Intergroup Welcome Message
A WELCOME TO NEWCOMERS, ONLOOKERS, AND ALL WHO SEEK A SOLUTION:
To everyone who is here, seen and unseen,
We welcome you! If you have struggled with compulsive sexual behavior, you are in the right place. All of us here, old-timers and newcomers, men and women, gay, straight and bisexual alike—wherever we are on the gender or sexual orientation spectrum—have the same issue. All of us know the hopelessness, the shame, the secrecy, the pain and the self-hatred that go along with being sexually compulsive. Here you are among others who understand, because we are just like you. We have experienced these things, and know how dark and hopeless life can appear. Many of us have felt that if anyone else knew about our problem with compulsive sex, or the things we have done, they would immediately reject us, and dismiss us as unworthy and disgusting. As a result, we have not sought help, and the secrecy and pain have continued. We have thought we could deal with our compulsion ourselves, employ self-discipline and will ourselves better, only to find that we could not change our behaviors and heal on our own.
However, you have come here, to this place where there is a solution. In coming here, you may well have started your journey along the path to solving the problem, and to healing from sexual compulsion. There is safety here, because you are among people who understand, who have the same problem, and because anonymity is fundamental to our fellowship.
You no longer need to suffer alone, with no solution in sight. There is a solution, and it does work. Many in our program have been given decades of ongoing sobriety from their sexually compulsive behaviors. There is hope for you too!
We encourage you to join us, to examine the SCA Program of Recovery with an open mind, to see how it works for us on a practical basis, to let go of isolation and walk together with us on the path that leads to healing.
In addition to the online meetings and helpful materials we offer on our website, on our Home Page, or at the top or bottom of each page, you can find links to our telephone meetings, and to the many excellent recovery resources available on the SCA International Service Organization website.
SCA is a 12-Step fellowship, inclusive of all sexual orientations, open to anyone with a desire to recover from sexual compulsion[1]. The Third Tradition states that the only requirement to be a member of SCA is a desire to stop having compulsive sex. In our collective experience, this includes not only impulsive and harmful sexual behaviors, but also problems such as romantic obsession, addiction to people, love or relationships, addiction to sexual or romantic fantasy, and the constant search for intimacy. SCA is open to all those with a desire to recover from sexual compulsion in any and all of its manifold forms of expression[2], including the use of technology to avoid intimacy and the compulsive avoidance of sex, also known as sexual anorexia[3]. Anyone qualifying under SCA’s Third Tradition is welcome to attend our meetings. You are a member of SCA when you decide you are.
The SCA Program uses not only the Twelve Steps that are derived from Alcoholics Anonymous, but also many other practical and helpful tools—The Tools That Help Us Get Better—to help members achieve and maintain sexual sobriety. Among these is the Sexual Recovery Plan. In SCA, individual members define sexual sobriety for themselves. Abstinence is determined by—among other things—not engaging in our personal bottom-line or acting-out behaviors[4]. This freedom reflects the reality of human sexuality and the nature of sexual compulsion: each person is unique, and behavior that is a problem for one member may well be fine for another. SCA supports the individual in his or her personal journey towards healthy sexuality.
It is a privilege to share this journey with others who are like us; to share compassion, understanding and acceptance of our mutual problem, and to pass on the solution which has worked for so many. We encourage you to make yourself known to us, to join us in sharing experience, strength and hope with each other, so that together we can help one another to find a life lived free from acting out our sexual compulsion, one day at a time.
In recovery and fellowship,
Online Intergroup of SCA
References:
1 SCA Self-Identification Statement © SCA-ISO
2 Affirming resolution passed by SCA-ISO April 26, 2015
3 Tradition Three Commentary – ”The Twelve Traditions of SCA” © SCA-ISO
4 ”Sponsorship in SCA” © SCA-ISO