Moderator (Chairperson) Materials

(This is the Moderator’s script for Online Intergroup Telephone Meetings of SCA)

Welcome to the (Sunday, Wednesday or Friday) Telephone Meeting of Sexual Compulsives Anonymous. My name is ______________, and I am a Sexual Compulsive and your chairperson for today’s meeting. Before we begin, I would like to remind you of two phone controls: *2 to raise or lower your hand; and *6 to mute or unmute your line.

Let’s open the meeting with a moment of silence for the still-suffering sexual compulsive both on and off our meeting line, followed by the Serenity Prayer.

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

Would someone please read the SCA Statement of Purpose?

Thank you.

(READ THIS IF NEWCOMERS PRESENT)

If this is your first time with us, you may not be sure what SCA is all about, what a Sexual Compulsive is, or if you belong here. We assure you we all had similar questions at our first meeting. We encourage you to stay and attend at least six meetings before you decide whether or not this program is for you. At this meeting we have readings of helpful literature and we share our personal experiences of dealing with this compulsion. Please feel free to join in during the sharing portions if you wish. Sharing is optional. Most importantly, know that you are in a safe place to express yourself about your problems with compulsive sex. You will develop your own understanding of the term as we continue. We welcome you. We are glad that you are here.

(CONTINUE) Would someone please read The Characteristics Most Of Us Seem To Have In Common?

Thanks! Now we need a volunteer to read the 12 Suggested Steps of SCA please.

Thank you! Would someone please read the 12 Traditions of SCA now. (If short of time, or many members are present, the Traditions can be truncated so only one is read, that corresponds to the number of the month, e.g. January = Tradition 1, May = Tradition 5)

FOCUS

(Chair’s discretion: SCA literature, long share, meeting topic, other recovery literature such as AA Big Book, AA 12 & 12 reading. If “10 minute long share”: what it was like, what happened, and what it is like now)

Thanks! Now it’s time for (EITHER) our special reading (OR) a long share (OR) our topic.

Today we will be reading__________. (OR) Today ___________will be giving us a long share for 10 to 15 minutes. (OR) Today our topic for the meeting is______________. Page 2 June, 2017

SHARING

(At the end of the reading, qualification, or setting of topic)

We have now come to the sharing portion of the meeting. Before we open the line for sharing, a reminder about cross talk and muting. We each have a responsibility to maintain the safety and usability of this meeting. We discourage cross talk, which we define as interrupting someone’s share or directly referring to someone else’s share in our own sharing. Also, we ask that you do not mention any specific location where you have acted out sexually, including websites, apps and TV channels, and that you refrain from the use of explicit or triggering sexual language during your sharing.

(READ ONLY IF THERE IS A LONG SHARE) In the case of a long share as we had today, it is appropriate to identify with the behaviours, situations and patterns the speaker has described as they may relate to our own experience when we share. We do not, however, try to advise, fix, or in any way judge the speaker, or the speaker’s program, as we share.

(CONTINUE) We ask that if you’re not recognized to share that you please either use your own phone’s muting controls if available, or use *6 to mute or unmute your input. This minimizes background noise distractions, giving everyone the best opportunity to focus on shares.

At this meeting, if no-one comes forward to share, the chairperson will ask members if they wish to share in order to keep the meeting moving along. If you are asked but do not wish to share, please just say your name, and that you pass. We will then move on to the next member. Thank you!

The floor is now open for sharing.

Who’d like to share next?

(Chairperson resumes when sharing stops or five minutes before the end of meeting)

We have now come to the end of the sharing portion of the meeting. I’d like to thank those who’ve served during this meeting and everyone who has shared, and I thank everyone for letting me be of service.

SEVENTH TRADITION

Let us be mindful that every SCA group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. Contributions help to offset the cost of our use of the Calliflower conferencing service, of producing and distributing SCA literature, and of carrying out SCA’s mission to be there for sexual compulsives seeking recovery. We ask that you contribute if you can through Online Intergroup’s website. A suggested donation is US $2.00 or more per meeting, accumulated and paid in lump sums of US$10.00 or more to minimize service charges. For contribution details, visit http://www.onlinesca.org/give. Newcomers, first meeting’s free, and contributions are always voluntary. Page 3 June, 2017

SERVICE

Service is a cornerstone of the SCA fellowship and personal recovery. Service keeps this meeting running and available to others seeking recovery. In addition to chairing and attending meetings, there are various forms of service and outreach that SCA encourages, and from which individuals and the group benefit. If you wish to become more involved in service, please speak to me after the meeting.

(Chairperson can also list any specific service positions that need filling at this point)

CONTACT LIST

This group maintains a voluntary and confidential group email list. SCA encourages contact between members between meetings, and telephone and other sponsorship. If you wish to add your address to the email list and receive a copy of it, please let me know at the end of the meeting, or send an email request to oimoderator@gmail.com. We ask that members attend six telephone meetings before joining the email list. The list is closed, and only circulated to those members who are on it. If you do not feel comfortable adding your email address to the list at this stage, you may consider simply exchanging contact information with one or two individuals instead, so that you have someone to reach out to between meetings.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Are there any announcements?

CLOSING

We have now reached the end of the meeting. Thank you for being here and sharing with us today. Whatever your pain or your challenges, we wish you the strength to keep reaching out for healing and support. We all deserve it. Keep Coming Back!

Would someone please read The Closing Statement?

“The opinions expressed here today are strictly those of the individuals who gave them. The things you have heard here are given and spoken in confidence and should be treated as confidential. If you try to absorb what you have heard, you are bound to gain a better understanding of the way to handle your problems. In the spirit of recovery from sexual compulsion, we suggest that sex between members not be treated lightly. Sex between people new to the fellowship and other members is discouraged. Talk to each other, reason things out with someone else, let there be no gossip or criticism of one another, but only love, understanding and companionship.”

Would all who care to please unmute your lines and join me in closing the meeting with the Serenity Prayer. At this meeting, our tradition is to say the closing Serenity Prayer using the plural form: saying “us” instead of “me,” and “we” instead of “I.”

“God, grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

And now the line is open for fellowship.